Ok so it has been a while, but I was waiting for Zachs ARD meeting to update everyone. So they did the eval over the last 12 weeks, it was a long process, but it is worth it, if it was rushed I think it would have been a disaster.
 Zach tested normal on paper, however when they did oral and observation he was defiantly Autistic, here is an example, on paper zach read a line something like this: Sue got a gift from Joe, is Joe a
                                                                                       a.friend
                                                                                       b enemy
                                                                                       c teacher
Zach picked a but when they asked him what is a friend he couldn't tell them, when they asked him who his friends were he gave 2 random names not even the boys he plays with. He lacks emotion, facial expressions ect. Zach has also learned to mask some of the Autistic traits from being bullied last year, however I recorded them at home so they could see what I see.

 In a nutshell zach falls on the spectrum and is getting the assistance he needs, the autism team has vowed to be by my side, and Terri is taking the time to personally walk us through Jr high and surviving it next year. I wont go into what he received, but I am pleased. I am just worn out, but if any one has questions please contact me at evans!.amber77@yahoo.com
Thanks and good night
Amber
                                                                                                                      

A change

Well it has been quite a different journey this year, Zach has gone from being bullied, to winning his student council election for class secretary, joining orchestra being happy to be at school. Of course we still have struggles, but having a kid that is not afraid to go to school is a start.
His grades were even pretty decent on his report card, I am so proud of him, he has come so far this year, I can only hope he continues to progress, and keep his head up.
Zach had a doctors appointment with his specialist in Lubbock a couple of weeks ago, she gave me some great tips for his anger and tantrum issues, when he gets to the point of anger and rage to give him the words, like " I understand you may hate me right now, you are mad, and that's OK, but why don't you go out back and scream and yell for a bit, and when you are done we can talk" so far it seems to really work.

Ok so here is my thought of the week, as I look back I thought my son was "normal" I didn't see the warning signs, one because I didn't know what they were, and 2 a moms first instinct is to deny. We do not want anything to be wrong with our kids, in our eyes they are perfect. As our kids grow we go to doctors visits and checkups, to compare their development to a chart. The thing about high functioning autistics is they may develop on track, sometimes even early, these charts we compare them too only signify a sever developmental issue. As parents we need to start rallying to change the system. We need to fight for more doctors to start asking questions that apply to autistic traits, such as does your child sit and spin things like tires on a toy car for LONG periods of time, do they seem obsessive, do they hurt themselves, flap, bang their head, throw long tantrums, make noises, speak at unusual tones, see hear or smell things you cant, seem sensitive to any of these things. These are the things that are left out of the well child checkups, and it needs to be addressed. If 1 out of 150 are diagnosed autistic, then why is their not more concern. I feel if Zach had been diagnosed a few years earlier he would be so much further ahead of where he is, and I as a parent would be a little more prepared. I have a child who it about to be a preteen, is about to enter Jr high, and is just now getting the help he should of had 5 years ago. Parents of all start telling your children's doctors they MUST start asking these questions.

now I am off my soap box thanks. night all!

 So it has been a little while since my last post, sorry I have been so busy for one and two I was waiting to see how Zach's first 3 weeks would go. My girls have soccer again so 4 nights a week we are at practice, Sat games, not a lot of time left but I will give you all a quick update.

 We had our first meeting with the school to start the evaluation process. I know some of you may not be familiar with this so here is how it works. After the doctor diagnosis, you then go to the school and ask for the programs they offer, if you are in a hell hole school like Zach's former school they do nothing. They dance around the issue and drop the ball, if you are at a good school you meet the AS team sign papers and bring home 4 evals for mom and dad to fill out. his teachers will fill out the same, then the AS team interviews the student, teacher, and parents. After that they determine what therapies, and classes he will need to help him succeed. Step one done YAY!!!!!!!!!

 Now Zach's school year is much better too! no more bullies so far any way, he is happy and loves school again! He has a job to catch any stray lizards that sneak into the school. Zach came home last Friday and announced he had joined orchestra, and needed a violin. He has been playing for a week and so far he loves doing it! Today he came home and said he was running for class secretary! Amazing! He is holding up his end of the bargain so far, I have pushed him to find something to do socially and I would come up with a reward for him, the more he tried and sticks with the better the reward! I stole this from the show Parenthood, LOL!!!

 Now the bad news, I got Zach's progress report and his grades are not so likable, so no video games till they come up to passing. They were very low so I have a meeting Monday to discuss how we will fix this issue and why it is this way to begin with. He is so smart I hate this for him. Not to mention if they don't come up he can't be Secretary or in Orchestra, and I think it would kill him, so we will do what we must to help him.

  I think that about sums it up for now, oh I took a video of him playing his games, and stemming to show what t looks like, but can't figure out how to get it from the phone to my computer so as soon as I do I will post it!


Love, Amber

Random

 The first full week at Zach's new school was a success! He was happy, and loved his new school! I just hope that continues.

 Today was not as bright, Zach has a rat named Rufus that he loves very much, he went to her cage she had passed away in the night. He was beside himself all day, we have had a few breakdowns, and fits. As with any kiddo, this would effect them this way his just comes out more in anger and aggression.

 Part of the reason I started this blog was to help parents like myself who feel, they have no answers, and alone at times. I spoke to a friend and told her I would describe some of the warning signs that we know now are signs. Here are the things Zach does over the years that would have identified Aspergers sooner if we had know.
Rocking
Headbanging when he was upset
Spinning the wheels on the toy cars for hours
walking with a ridged gate
Lack of coordination
Speech problems
dyslexia
OCD ( this is a new development)
Strong obsessions or interests ( can speak about it like he has a phd in it)
Had twitching or tapping
Unaware of the social norms
Speaks loudly and rapidly when excited
gets bullied
wanders
doesn't respond to his name at all times
there are more and I probably just can't think of them right now I hope this helps.

Amber

Just like west texas

 I would describe Aspergers like West Texas, sunny and warm one minute, stormy and raining the next. That was today, Zach had a great day, that is until around 7pm, after that it was melt down, and tantrum, one after another. Yelling at his sister, crying over every little thing, right back to happy. He was really overstimulated today, he was making a lot of noises, tapping and twitching his hands and fingers, rapid speaking, I think that was a sign the storm was on it's way.

  Now Zach is in bed, all is peaceful, lets hope it stays that way.

Love,

Amber

A New Day

  Well his new school seems to be going well, I know it is only 3 days in, but he is truly happy, and he is not all alone. He is making friends, i know of 2 for sure, one boy and one girl, of course he didn't go into detail, but I am happy none the less. That is the one thing that absolutely drives me nuts, I want to know what he likes so much, but he just does not elaborate, I have to pry and pry just to get more than "good" or "fine" when I ask him how his day went. One day at a time right, I guess I will take his word for it and move on.

 I discovered to day I am no longer alone either, I have been thrilled all day! I have been talking to a mom going through the exact same things, and her son is roughly the same age, I have someone to compare with, to learn with, and to vent to who understands 100% how I feel! I know I have friends that are there for me, great friends, but all anyone can do is listen, no one really knows what I am going through. I do have a couple of friends who have Asperger kids, but they do not live near me, and it would be nice to grab coffee, or go to the park, have play dates, and just not have to explain it all of the time. I now I have a fabulous husband, but it is still not like talking to another mother, not to mention Mike has to listen to me all of the time, so I will give him a break.

  I guess there is not much more to report, it has been a slow week,not much going on Zach has had a few minor melt downs, but really nothing too bad. His stems have been up a little this week, but I figure that is from the excitement of school starting. (for those of you who don't know stems they are a self stimulant that AS people when they are overstimulated, some flap, tap, hit, tap ect) I guess i am off to do laundry! Night all!

Love,
Amber

Six Months In

 Over the past 6 months there has been so much I have wanted to share, vent or just get off my chest, and while I have great friends and family who ask how Zach is, sometimes i just feel like I talk about it too much to them or some days just tired of speaking of Aspergers.
 The purpose of my blog is to allow myself to open up get it all out, and hopefully raise some awareness, of what I like to call "The Hidden Autism".
 Let me take you back a few years, Zachary my son who is now 11 had some issues when he started Kindergarten, while he had always been in daycare or Pre K, the more structured environment of kindergarten was really difficult for him, he could not focus, get work done, even crawled under the lunch room tables. I asked his teacher to try some different approaches and to document every little thing. I did the same at home and finally took all of the information to the doctor. Zach was diagnosed ADHD, and started medication, as a different kid, he sat in his seat did his work it was a new beginning, we were all happy and thought that would be the end. Lord I wish I could say it was.
 Everything seemed to be well until first grade, after speaking to Zach's teacher, he was once again distracted, by what she said was imaginary sounds, always fidgeting, making noises, spinning his pencil, I was so upset, one that it took her so long to tell me anything was wrong, and two why didn't I notice this. I took Zach back to the Dr. and they changed his meds, this time there was a small change, at least enough for him to function in school. I decided to post some of the things going on to my My Space page, and a friend of mine told me how her son was diagnosed with Aspergers, when I asked detail the word Autism popped up and I shut down. See in my head all Autistics were like well rain man, to me Autism was not my kid. I sure wished I had listened, I regret that one day of not listening more than anything in my life.
 The next few years that conversation stayed with me but I pushed it way down, we switched out meds, tried different behavior tactics, and for the most part things went well. My biggest complaint at that time was his breakdowns, horrible outburst that came out of no where. At times he would even attack his little sisters, he would scream bang his head on the wall,  just lose all control. I noticed he always said really inappropriate things and didn't seem to get different emotions. Not that he didn't know what they were, but for instance if you watched "Old Yeller" and cried, he just didn't get it.
  By the fifth grade I noticed any friend he had no longer called, I never heard about them anymore. I drove by the school a couple of times during recess and he was always alone. Then we found out he was being bullied, by most of the kids. He came home with nasty letters, calling him names, pencil marks all over him, complaints of be pushed or hit. Kids calling him names making fun of his actions. It was a nightmare, and this time I knew, I had to bring up Aspergers.
  The week before the doctors appointment i researched, had teachers take notes, really hoping to find a different explanation. The day of the appointment I presented the facts to his Dr. who then set up a referral with a specialist in Lubbock, in march, 2 months away.
 In March 2010 my son was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, it is on the Autism spectrum, he is a high functioning Autistic. Why did I not notice it? All of the signs had been there, all along, I was blind, but most of all uniformed.
 Long story short Zach had a horrible school year, summer was great and now he has started school at a new school, he is only 2 days in so here starts a new journey. He will get the MISD eval he never recived from his previous school, start his speech and AS therapies soon. I hoope you all join me for this journey, a journey through my awakening as a parent, as I learn maybe others will too.

Love,
Amber